I have come to accept that how I cope with the death of loved ones may not really change.
The way I acknowledge and accept it is an unfortunate expedited process.
I do not like it yet I cannot stand to prolong it.
Why dwell on the numbness? Why ponder on the what if’s?
It is. It was.
It does not bring them back and the tears have been spent.
However, the death of self has been painfully annoying to say the least.
Why do I fear this? This internally persistent uncertainty can be daunting.
No matter the truth, there remains an unsettling hesitation.
Lord, please forgive my doubt.
Yes, I know we have been through this.
Progress feels slow at times but I know this transparency is a part of that.
I am not deserving of Your grace.
Help me to calm my spirit and become more disciplined in this pursuit.
I am not sure what tomorrow may bring, but today I choose YOU!
TheKiaraProject 