Tag: worry

It was about 20 years ago when her first known traumatic experience occurred. This little girl I knew didn’t really understand what was going on, but had an uneasy feeling about it. That unfortunate event was suppose to set her down this life course of fear, pain, and destruction. That event was suppose to keep her quiet, meek, and locked in a dark box, accepting what others thought about her. That event was suppose to send her down the same path of generational hardships she thought she should be complacent with. That event was suppose to cripple her mind into believing she was to blame and she deserved the adverse effects. That event was suppose to pierce her heart and make her believe that Love was not written in her story….in her destiny. Twenty years later, I met with this now young woman for a much needed conversation. Although anxiety rushed through my veins and post-traumatic stress rushed through hers, we both knew the time had come. We sat down facing each other and as I took a deep breath, a subtle smile began to form on her face. I looked into her eyes and watched them well up with tears (of joy). My eyes too began to well up (but of grief). For some reason I wanted to apologize for not being the strong woman she needed for all those years. For a second, I felt as if I failed her some how. But she feels this and reaches over to put her hands in mine. I started to put my head down, but she immediately tells me to pick my head up. She then says, “Stop beating yourself up. They were wrong. He sees us, knows us, and Loves us. There is no more need to worry; we are doing well Kiara.” And then it happened…my nerves were finally at ease.